Every year, there are lots of beautiful things everyone is prone to miss if one doesn’t look carefully at all the blessings.
I turned 18 yesterday. I couldn’t be more grateful. There were lots of wishes, I replied to them all until midnight, which is why this post came up a little later. Thank you for being so kind.
18th birthday was my first birthday without the most influential person in my life, my mother. For a moment, the thought hit me hard as I felt a hole in my chest, widening. I need to thank logic for saving me. It poked my shoulder and said : “Don’t be a baby. Get out and get your big plans in progress. What’s all this crying will do anyway? Wake up, you can still make her proud.”
On every birthday, we all will stare at something and think of how we’ve been through the things which we thought we don’t have the ability to overcome and how the life lessons have made us who we are. On every birthday, although we realize it’s just a day closer to death, we will want to live even more, to live better.
17 has taught me to ask myself whether something really matters. Continuously being sad over the thought of someone’s departure, as for me, the thought of my mother, doesn’t matter. The desire to keep being a better person is what matters. It’s the only thing I must do to keep her past efforts worthy, to keep her inside me.
17 has also taught me that our words must be filtered before they’re breathed out. “Is it necessary?” It’s the thing most of us often forget. I’m aware that this will take a long time to master. Human has the huge tendency of wanting to be heard, that’s why some just can’t stop talking.
17 has taught me that those who will to stay by your side are those who matter the most. After 17, I don’t have the desire to hold anyone back. If someone wants to leave, one will find a way sooner or later. The same thing applies to someone who wants to stay.
17 has taught me that we shouldn’t expect anything from anybody. It’s the natural source of disappointment. Prepare for the worst by yourself. Don’t expect anyone to do as what you told one to.
When my 17 was about to end, I came to the understanding of how we are really what we think. I’ve known that quote for a long time,but it wasn’t until this guy explained it again that I finally embrace that quote everyday. It’s what makes me happy everyday. Thank you to one of my favorite seniors for making me rethink it, for making me, in a way or another, understand it so much more.
As my 17 came to end, I also realized that some feelings aren’t meant to be said out loud. Some feelings are meant to keep as a secret and find their way to be verbalized in prayers. If we love someone hard enough, without realizing it, we will try to let one be happy, even if we’re not naturally the source of one’s happiness. And we’ll truly be fine with it because we also know that God is working a way out to make us meet the person we’re meant to be with.
Oh, I really want to list all the things I’ve learned during my 17. I remember saying 17 would be a great age, and it indeed was a great age. So, I must again say that 18 will also be a great age, so it will become one.
My family, my compassionate friends (this include my favorite seniors, oh y’all will be known in the future), my awesome acquaintances, and the great people who don’t even know me yet they teach me things through their published words, thank you for existing. I can’t live alone, so you all are definitely the best gift from God to me.
As I end this post, I will recommend a book for you who have the will to keep being better. Please read The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch, you’ll find yourself being motivated. The moment I finished the book, I knew I had just became better.
Alhamdulillah for the chance to be 18. I will enjoy this age, just as y’all will enjoy yours. Have a great day.